Breaking The Rules
by Raven O'Ryan
Summary: A parody on teenage horror films/ spoofs like Scream, Urban Legend, I.K.W.Y.D.L.S. and Scary Movie
1. Part 1

A note to the reader: This is a parody based on teenage horror films w/ my own origional characters inserted into them  
  
Disclaimers: I do not own the rights to Scream, I Know What You Did Last Summer, Urban Legend, or Scary Movie- this story is merely a work of parody  
  
I do not own the rights to the song "Dead Bodies Everwhere" by KoRn which is quoted in the story below. I merely used a line from the story in quotation of the song to give J. Davis credit for good lyrics which fit to part of my story.  
  
Breaking the Rules by Raven A. O'Ryan  
  
Page Bookman was watching her favorite movie, Scream, when she saw the beams of siren lights flash through the room. When they continued to flash she knew they had stopped at her house and she went to her window that overlooked the front porch and driveway. A patrol car sat there and her father was outside talking to a police man. She watched her father walk back toward the porch and open the door. Then she heard him holler: "PAGE! GET DOWN HERE NOW!"   
  
Heart leaping up into her throat she slowly got to her feet and went downstairs. Once outside she was even more confused and alarmed to see that she recognized the young officer. "Tom? What is it?"  
  
Officer Tom Sheridan, walked toward her, his biceps rippling through his thin blue police uniform; his gorgeous mouth set in a firm, somber line. "Page Bookman, under Code 5, section 115, you have been violated w/ the usage and possession of illegal narcotics on public school grounds. You are herby under arrest."  
  
"What?!" Page cried incredulously. "That's insane!"  
  
"You have the right to remain silent," Officer Sheridan continued, bringing out a pair of handcuffs and securing her hands in front of her.   
  
"Tom! I never-"  
  
"Everything you say can and will be held against you in a juvenile court of law."  
  
"TOM! I've never in my entire life even TOUCHED any-"  
  
"You have the right to an attorney," Officer Sheridan interrupted, taking her arm and leading her to the rear door of his patrol car. "If you cannot afford an attorney one will be provided for you."  
  
The door was closed on her and before she knew it, Page was zipping down the road, locked in the back of the car like a caged animal. "Tom!" she cried for the kzillioneth time, "this is crazy! I've never done drugs in my life! How- how can you even ACCUSE me of this let alone ARREST me???"  
  
Officer Sheridan kept his face forward, eyes focused on the road. "You're in some serious trouble Miss Bookman. If I were you I'd settle down and enjoy the ride rather than acting out."  
  
  
"Enjoy the ride?! This is bullshit!"  
  
Officer Sheridan tried not to laugh. "You'd better watch your mouth little lady, when you get into that courtroom in a few weeks you'll be held in contempt w/ a mouth like that."  
  
"A few weeks! How long are they going to keep me in jail?" Page demanded, leaning up against the grated wire that separated her from the front seat.   
  
"You can't go to jail 'till you're eighteen but if I have my way I'll make sure they keep you in juvy 'till you can be transferred so I can visit your pretty face more often," Officer Sheridan chortled.  
  
Page raised her cuffed fists up and hit the grate. "You bastard! That's not funny! How can you make light of all this? I thought you cared about me."  
  
Officer Sheridan just smiled at her in the rearview mirror.   
  
Page slammed her back against the seat and sulked angrily.  
  
Officer Sheridan pulled off the main road and proceeded down a desolate dirt road that was lined w/ large overhanging evergreen trees.   
  
Page looked out of her window mournfully. "Is THIS where the juvenile hall is?"  
  
Officer Sheridan laughed out loud. "Sure, this can be your prison."  
  
Page was too upset to be confused anymore. "Listen you little prick, if you don't clear my name from this stupid, fucked up crime that I didn't even commit then you're going to be-"  
  
"We're here!" Officer Sheridan interrupted, pulling the patrol car to a halt and turning off the siren lights.   
  
Page looked around. They were in the middle of the woods now, in a remote clearing. "What the hell? Is this some kind of joke-"  
  
Officer Sheridan got out of the car and proceeded to unlock her door.  
  
"Look if you don't tell me what the hell is going on he-"  
  
Officer Sheridan cut her off w/ a swift, hard kiss on the mouth.  
  
Page's eyebrows shot up in absolute confusion now as he sat back on his haunches and grinned at her.  
  
"Gotcha!" he crowed.   
  
Page didn't know whether to laugh in relief or scream at him. "You little asshole!"   
  
Officer Sheridan laughed as he helped her out of the car and to her feet. "That was the best, Pagey, I can't believe you bought the whole thing!"  
  
Page scowled. "Well, it's kinda hard to NOT believe someone when they cuff you and throw you in the back of a cop car."  
  
He smiled at her and brushed her long, coppery hair out of her face. "You're so pretty when you're mad, Page."  
  
"You're still a prick, Tom."  
  
Tom chuckled. "Aw, c'mon, baby, I thought you'd get a kick out of it. Think of it as being a way for us to go out together when I'm on duty."  
  
Page rolled her eyes. "How romantic."  
  
Tom grinned and gave her another quick peck on the mouth. "See? I knew you'd approve."  
  
Page let out a big sigh. "Yeah, well now what?"  
  
"Hmm, well, what do you think cops do when they drag innocent little girls out into the middle of nowhere?"  
  
"I don't think cops do that to nice little innocent girls- you're a legend in your own sickly twisted way."  
  
Tom just laughed again. "Thank you, thank you."  
  
"So..." Page drawled looking around at the semidarkness of the trees on all sides of them. "Are you going to take the handcuffs off?"   
  
Tom cupped her chin in his hand and pressed her back against the patrol car w/ the rest of his body. "I dunno... handcuffs could be kind of kinky..."  
  
Page frowned. "Oh, yay, not only do I have the interesting twist of dating a cop but now I'll have the rep of being w/ the one and only sadistic sex-crazed one."  
  
He kissed her lips, her cheek, her neck. "Doesn't that do your reputation good though? You should feel lucky I'm so easy on you."  
  
"Easy on me? What do you mean?"  
  
"Well... say sometime I catch you doing ninety in a thirty-mile zone. I'd let you off since I know you'd reward me w/ a kiss or something..."  
  
Page pushed him away w/ the backs of her hands. "Tom Sheridan," she mocked, her first smile since her arrest breaking free. "Are you trying to use your powers of legal authority to bribe me?"  
  
Tom closed the small distance between them a second time. "No... just pointing out that since I have boyfriendal favoritism towards you I'd get around things for you."  
  
"Gee thanks," she scoffed as he began to kiss her shoulder. "Remind me to ask for you when they catch me selling crack to the cheerleaders in the girls' room."  
  
Tom looked up at her and smirked devilishly. "That's it, now you're gonna get it."  
  
He opened the driver side door and shoved her inside, following after her giggling protests.  
  
Approximately forty-five minutes later, Page looked up at Tom and kissed him gently. The windows of the patrol car were steamy but from the lack of light around them, she could tell it was getting late. "Maybe we should go now?"  
  
Tom looked back down at her and smiled. "After that? I'm going to have to rest first." He lay back down on top of her and nuzzled her neck w/ his nose. "You know, I think I saw this in a movie once."  
  
"Yeah, Tom, it was called Titanic only Leonardo DiCaprio didn't have to use handcuffs on Kate Winslett."  
  
Tom tickled her naked side and she shrieked.   
  
"Yeah well, Leo ended up drowning, baby. That won't happen to-"  
  
"Shh!" Page cut him off.   
  
Tom looked at her. "What?"  
  
"Did you hear that?"   
  
Tom touched her cheek. "Oh, c'mon... Titanic wasn't an urban legend- the worst that could've happened to them is getting caught by some rich snob looking around and-"  
  
"Tom, I'm serious, I heard a noise out there."  
  
Tom groaned. "Aw, Page, you kill me."  
  
"Can we leave?"  
  
"Why?"  
  
There was a squeak on the back windshield.   
  
"What the hell?" Tom said, sitting up.   
  
His knees ground into Page's thighs but she was far to frightened now to car. She drew herself out from under him and then looked over his shoulder. "What is it?" she whispered.  
  
"I dunno, I can't see," he replied. He reached past her and into the glove compartment to take out his flashlight. Shining it toward the back they both peered through the grating.  
  
Page jumped back and gasped as she read the words that were streaked onto the windshield:  
  
NAUGHTY, NAUGHTY!  
  
"Dumb fuck!" Tom cursed, pulling his uniform pants on.  
  
"What are you doing?" Page hissed.  
  
"I'm gonna go beat the living daylights outta whoever the sick ass who wrote that is."  
  
"What? No!" Page objected, her heart pounding.   
  
But Tom had his shoes on now and was working on putting his shirt on. He pulled a blanket w/ the Cedar Hill Police logo out from under the seat and threw it at her. "Just stay in here and wait for me, k?"  
  
"To-om!" Page said. "Remember that little talk we had about doing stupid things way back when? Well, this is stupid. Let's just get out of here."  
  
"Hell no, Page!" Tom replied, opening the door. "This dumb fuck can get my ass locked up! I'm not going to let that happen."  
  
"Tom, please!"   
  
"I'll be right back," Tom told her and shut the door.   
  
She listened to his feet crunch over the leaves on the ground outside and shivered, trying to wrap the blanket around herself but not having much luck, due to the handcuff that still held her wrists together.   
  
Tapping on the back side of the car. "Shit!" Page whispered and fumbled around for her jeans. She struggled to get them on and then pulled the shirt on that Tom had pulled above her head and down onto her arms earlier. Soon she might have to run or someone would be breaking into the car. She'd seen too many teen horror flicks to be stupid enough to sit around naked and waiting.  
  
The tapping continued on around to her side of the car and then the squeaking noise of someone wiping at the window.   
  
Page scooted herself away from the noise as fast as she could and opened the door. Slowly, so she wouldn't fall down she turned her feet out and then stood up. She jogged out into the darkness and away from the patrol car. "Tom?" she called out. "Tom!"  
She heard footsteps behind her. "Tom, is that you?"  
  
No answer. The footsteps drew closer.  
  
"No!" she cried quietly. She began to jog a little faster, struggling to keep her balance w/out the use of her arms and hands. She tripped over something and fell on top of it.   
  
As if on cue, the moon appeared from behind the a shade of clouds and revealed the person underneath her. He was covered in blood and his neck and face were slashed. He wasn't moving.   
  
"AAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Page screamed and threw herself on her back to get away from the body "AAAAAAAAAAAAH!"  
  
  



	2. Part2

"So," Deputy Rye asked, circling Page in the chair. "You saw this body, any idea who it was?"  
  
"Yes," Page swallowed, on the brink of tears. "His name was David Ianson. He went to school w/ me."  
  
"Are you friends w/ the victim?"  
  
"Yeah, well we were until now."  
  
"Mmmhmm. So how did you find him?"  
  
"I was there, I fell on him when I was trying to get away. I couldn't see."  
  
"Trying to get away from whom? From what?"  
  
"The person who killed him obviously!" Page cried.  
  
"Did you see this person?"  
  
"No, but he- or she- was tapping on the windows of the car."  
  
"What car? Whose car were you in?"  
  
"In Tom's-" Page stopped, realizing she would get him in trouble.  
  
"Tom's car? Are we talking about Tom Sheridan? The same Tom Sheridan who picked you up from your house to arrest you?"  
  
Page's eyes went wide. "How- how did you know about that?"  
  
Deputy Rye began to laugh and dropped himself into a chair across from her. "Jesus H. Christ. Sonofabitch is at it again."  
  
"What do you mean?" Page asked, sitting forward.  
  
Deputy Rye waved a hand at her, signaling to dismiss the tramatic atmosphere in the room. "Sheridan. Playing pranks. He and I go way back doing that sorta B.S. to one another- I never thought he'd-" he paused to look at her. He coughed. "This will remain confidential, Miss Bookman. I don't want this getting around the office or your friend Officer Sheridan and I could both get canned."  
  
"But Deputy, there's been a murder!"  
  
Deputy Rye stood up again. "Miss Bookman, there's been no murder. He's playing a prank on you."  
  
"Then why didn't he bring me home? Why did he let me run all the way down here and risk getting him in trouble?"  
  
The deputy looked like he would consider the idea but then dismissed it as quickly as it had risen. "I'll call him now and get him down here so you can get the cuffs off, ok?"  
  
Tom showed up about ten minutes later. "Page!" he said when he saw her, "I've been looking everywhere for you!"  
  
"Who the hell do you think you are?" Page demanded, tears streaming down her face unabashed. "That was just sick, Tom, sick!"  
  
Tom and Deputy Rye both looked at the stares they were getting from colleagues and pulled her back into the questioning room.   
  
"Young lady, I hate to do this," Deputy Rye said, "but I'm going to have to ask you to keep quiet about this- you could get your friend Officer Sheridan fired you know. Pranks aren't taken lightly around here."  
  
"Good!" Page fumed. "I hope his dumb ass DOES get fired!" she spun on her heel and stalked out the door before the two men of the law could stop her.  
  
Tom took a seat and rubbed his palm against his temple.   
  
"This isn't going to look good if your little girlfriend presses charges, Sheridan," Deputy Rye said.  
  
Tom sighed. "I don't think she will. It was just a joke. I feel bad about it now though- she must've been pretty scared. I went looking for that creep who was messin' w/ the window and when I got back from the car she was already gone, headed here I guess-"  
  
"Wait a minute, are we talking about the same creep that Page claims to have tripped over? The DEAD guy?"  
  
"What?" Tom asked, rising out of the chair in shock. "What dead guy? She saw a dead guy? Shit! No wonder she's scared-I'm going to have to go find her, poor girl-"  
  
Deputy Rye caught him by the shoulder. "No, we're going to have to go to the scene of the crime. Find the supposed body."  
  
"But they'll trace it back to me- or say she does talk, or someone pressures her into talking? I'll get fried!" Tom said frantically.  
  
Deputy Rye shook his head sternly, a gesture he didn't usually use on his old pal, Officer Sheridan. "We know you didn't do it, Sheridan. We'll find the bastard who did do it though. We have to, it's our responsibility. Besides," he said, clapping him on the back,"don't you think they'd find you even more suspicious if she testifies that you were at the scene of the crime and you didn't do anything about it?"  
  
Classes were dismissed early the next day at Cedar Hill High School in honor of David Ianson.   
  
Page walked to her blue Chevy Camero w/ her friends, Kally Johnson, Barry Knox and Bailey Garris.   
  
"I can't believe you were THERE," Barry was saying. "That must've been"  
  
"Barry!" Kally hissed, hitting him in the stomach.   
  
Page nodded. "It was... well fucked up to put it lightly."  
  
"So who do you think did it?" Barry asked, rubbing his stomach.  
  
"Barry!" Kally said through her teeth again.  
  
Page shook her head. "I dunno. It could be anyone. I can't think of anyone who would have wanted to kill David though... he was such a sweet guy..." a solitary tear ran down her cheek.   
  
"You were there w/ Tom, right?" Bailey pursued, his glittering green eyes gleaming w/ intrigue. "Who else was there?"  
  
"No one except the person who murdered him," Page asserted bitterly.  
  
"And David," Barry added.  
  
Page stopped walking and looked at her friends. "Right. I don't even know why or how David would know we were there in the first place but you're right. He was there."  
  
"And someone obviously didn't WANT him to be there and killed him," Bailey finished.  
  
Page stared at him, wide-eyed. "It wasn't Tom, if that's what you guys are thinking. He'd never kill anyone-he's a cop for christ sakes!"  
  
Kally put a sympathetic arm around her. "No one said he did it..."  
  
"But he was there!" Barry interjected.  
  
"Some of the most innocent people can be monsters underneath," Bailey said.  
  
"Stop it, both of you!" Page cried, the tears running down her cheeks now. "I just lost one of my best friends, I don't need you to get my boyfriend run down, too!" She'd never admit it out loud but she was beginning to have her suspicions about Tom Sheridan as well.   
  
Kally opened the large scrapbook of periodicals. "Hey, look at this!"  
  
Page put down the newspaper she had been looking at and walked up to Kally.  
  
They'd been looking for clues at the Cedar Hill Public Library that would hopefully lead them to the murderer.  
  
Kally began to read the article she'd found.  
  
" 'OFFICER ABRAM RYE RECEIVES DEPUTY TITLE '"  
  
'Today local police officer, Abram Rye completed   
his training for deputy ranks....  
  
"Yadda, yadda yadda, 'Sheriff Burkstrom presented  
Rye w/ badge...' Yadda, yadda, yadda...  
  
'Rye was accompanied by mother, Winifred Rye, friend  
and partner in law, Officer Thomas Sheridan and   
nephew David Ianson.' "  
  
Page's eyebrows shot up in the air. "I didn't know Rye and David were related!" She grabbed at one of the book's covers to look at the picture. Sure enough, Deputy Rye stood there, holding his badge for the camera, w/ his mother on one arm and David and Tom on his other side.   
  
"Hmm," Kally mused. "Do you think that would have anything to do w/ it?"  
  
Page frowned, struggling to come up w/ a good conclusion. "Maybe David and Tom were friends too... I mean, he never mentioned David except when I brought him up but it's possible."  
  
"And maybe," Kally said, her mind spinning w/ ideas, "David and Tom or David and Deputy Rye had some sort of disagreement?"  
  
Page continued to frown. "You think Barry and Bailey are right about Tom, don't you?"  
  
Kally shrugged. "I'm not saying it's written in stone, Page, but who else can we point a finger at? If it wasn't you and it wasn't Tom, who else would have killed him and why?"  
  
Page thought. "Ok, well... you said he might have had a fight w/ one of them. Why not Deputy Rye? I mean, he's his uncle and a figure of the law enforcement. Maybe David got busted doing something and he got angry at his uncle for not cutting him some slack."  
  
Kally pushed a long strand of long, chestnut brown hair behind her ear. "So you think it was Deputy Rye?"  
  
Page bit her lip. "Well, when I was at the police station, he seemed to know everything that was going on. He knew about Tom's fake arrest on me- he called it 'a prank'."   
  
"Anything else?"  
  
"Well, he said I could get Tom into a lot of trouble if I said anything."  
  
Kally sucked her breath in. "And he could've gotten in even more trouble if someone who wasn't on Tom's good side told," she whispered. "Someone like David!"  
  
Page grabbed her friend by the arm. "C'mon, Kal, we have to find Tom!"  
  
Back at the police station, a very frantic Page was spilling her newfound information to a flustered Officer Sheridan.  
  
"No, Page, there's not a snowball's chance in hell that Rye would pull something like that-he's my best friend."  
  
"Exactly, Tom!" Page said, grabbing his arm for emphasis. "That's why he's the prime suspect! Best friends fight for one another through thick and thin and if one of them gets in trouble, the other one bails him out! I think that David was spying on us and Deputy Rye didn't want him to rat you out to Sheriff Burkstrom."  
  
"Page, when I say he's my best friend I mean that I know him. He'd never kill anyone. He's got a legal obligation as well as a good set of morals."  
  
"But maybe he isn't what he seems, Tom! What if... what if David was in some kind of trouble and he didn't help him out?"  
  
Kally jumped into the conversation w/ a new idea. "Yeah, what if Deputy Rye showed up to see how your 'prank' was going and found David there and they got into a fight about it. And the argument of David being a troublemaker came up and so they began to struggle. Maybe Deputy Rye didn't even mean to kill him, maybe David attacked him. It could've been self-defense!"  
  
Tom gaped at them as if he were about to agree and then shook his head. "Where in the hell do you two get these ideas?"  
  
Page smiled cynically. "We watch a lotta teen slasher flicks."  
  
More library research led the trio to the discovery that David Ianson was in fact a troublemaker. Though not many people knew, before he and his family moved to Cedar Hill he had a big shoplifting record and was known for missing a lot of school.   
Page read through the computer's newspaper article sadly. "Just like Bailey said,people aren't always as great as they seem to be."  
  
Tom rested his hands on the back of her chair and buried his mouth in her hair.  
  
"Yeah," he murmured, "I never knew you were a cyber nerd."  
  
"Tom!" she admonished. "This is NOT something to be taken lightly.  
  
Tom kissed the top of her head and looked at the screen. "Sorry, sorry."  
  
Kally was looking through another book of periodicals when her eyes froze on a particularly alarming caption. She slowly looked over at Tom and Page and in a moment of fright grabbed up her purse and slammed the book shut.  
  
They both turned to look at her. "Kally?"  
  
Kally backed away from them, her eyes filled w/ fear. "I can't- I- I-I've gotta go!"  
W/ that she turned and fled the library as fast as she could.   
  
"I saw it, Barry!" Kally was crying out. "Right there in the Cedar Hill Times it said, 'Thomas Sheridan was arrested on two accounts of disturbing peace.' "  
  
Barry shrugged his shoulders high. "So the guy got into a fight. That makes him a murderer?"  
  
"I don't know, Barry, but he was the only one there that we know of besides Page   
and Page was the one who found David's dead body."  
  
"Hey, speaking of dead bodies, look who's coming our way."  
  
Kally glanced away from Barry to see the tall, dark and handsome Strange Carrison.  
  
The raven-haired sixteen year old was bedecked in leather boots, a black leather jacket and pair of black denim jeans.   
  
"Well, looky what the cadavers dragged in!" Barry crowed.   
  
Kally said nothing and continued to watch Strange who wasn't just passing by but actually approaching them.   
  
"Hello, Kally, Barry," he greeted them.  
  
Barry grinned w/ delight in the torture he was about to lay on Strange. "Heya, Strange. How's the family?"  
  
Strange nodded. "Good."  
  
"Oh, really? 'Cause last time I heard they were pretty cold, smelly and slab-laden if you know what I mean!"   
  
"Barry!" Kally said, elbowing him in the ribs. She thought Strange was kinda creepy but she would never say anything rude to his face.   
  
"Well, Barry, last time I checked I couldn't smell a thing," Strange retorted.  
  
"Yeah," Barry laughed. "Because you're so used to smelling like death yourself!"  
  
Strange glared at him and then turned his attention to Kally. "Have you seen Raven?   
I've been looking all over for her but nobody's seen her. She was supposed to meet me after school to help me w/ my English homework."  
  
Barry laughed some more. "Oh, so now you're running around w/ Rave-Rave, huh? You got a thing for pasty people dontcha?"  
  
Kally gave him another poke to the ribs.  
  
Strange looked about ready to explode. Instead of answering though he walked away in a huff.  
  
Barry began to sing: "you really want me to be a good son. Why do you make me feel like no one? Dum da da dum dead bodies everywherrrrre!"  
  
Kally smacked him.  
  
"Ow! What?"  
  
"Why do you have to be such an ass, Barry? He didn't do anything to you and you know Raven is my friend. You didn't have to make fun of HER."  
  
"Well, it's not my fault she's as pale as a corpse. She looks like a walking vampire."  
  
Kally hit him once again.   
  
"Ouch! What? She does! And how can you NOT make fun of someone who's dad is an undertaker?"  
  
Kally got up from her seat on the side of the high school's large outdoor fountain and walked away, ignoring Barry's annoying howls of laughter.  
  
Once down the main steps of the campus she spotted a slender but short brunette walking towards a brown Toyota Corolla. "Hey!" Kally called out.  
  
Raven O'Ryan smiled and turned around. "Hey, Kally, what's up?"  
  
Kally jogged up to her and frowned. "Oh, not much. Just freaked about the murder you know."  
  
Raven nodded. "Yeah, you never think it'll happen to someone you know. Pretty scary." She studied Kally's troubled face. "Something else is bothering you, Kal... I mean, I know you knew David but I think the only people really close to him were Bailey Garris,Rodney Phibert and of course, Page."  
  
Kally was near tears. "I'm scared for Page, Raven. I really am."  
  
"Page?" Raven looked alarmed. "Why? Because she was there? You think she's having a breakdown or something? Post traumatic stress?"  
  
Kally waved all the suggestions away, agitated. "No, it's Tom."  
  
"Tom..." Raven searched her memory. "Oh! Cop Tom! Her boyfriend."  
  
"Yeah. I think Tom killed David."  
  
"What?! How could that be? I thought Page was the one who-"  
  
"Yeah, Page found him but Tom was w/ her. He left the car to see who had been making noise on the window."  
  
"Noise on the window? This is starting to sound like an Urban Legend..." Raven said, doubtfully.  
  
"Well, it happened!" Kally cried desperately and Tom was the only other person there. Plus I found this!" she said, shoving a copy of the newspaper article on Tom's arrest that she'd pulled up in the computer lab at school that day.   
  
Raven read over and looked at Kally, frightened agreement beginning to rise in her.  
  
"Wow. You could be right."  
  
"Yeah, I need to see if I can find anything else out... Page doesn't believe me and I doubt she's going to listen w/out more concrete evidence."  
  
"Do you want me to help you?"  
  
Kally smiled at Raven's generosity. "Thanks, Rave, but I think someone else could use your help more. Strange was looking for you, I guess he's not doing to well in his English class."  
  
"Oh, crap!" Raven cried, smacking her forehead. "I was supposed to look for him when school got out."  
  
"Yeah he should be here still-it was only a couple of minutes ago."  
  
"Ok, I'll go look for him," she said jogging away and throwing Kally a smile. "Good luck Detective Johnson and be careful!"   
  
  



	3. Part3

Page was lying on her four-poster bed, using Tom's stomach as a pillow. They were listening to Loose Fuse KLTC radio. "So, if it wasn't Deputy Rye, who do you think it was?" she asked.  
  
Tom let out a deep breath. "Why do we have to keep talking about this? It's being investigated. The murderer will be found."  
  
Page rolled over on her stomach and propped herself up on her elbows so she could look at him. "Are YOU investigating it?"  
  
"Yes... we all have to, it's local crime."  
  
"So who do you think did it?"  
  
"Why? Do you think it was ME?"  
  
Page felt the hair on the back of her neck stand on end. She felt very disconnected and uneasy all of a sudden. "Nooo, I just wonder who you think it is. I mean, I am. I was at the crime scene."  
  
"Page, he could've been there for hours before we even got there. How do we know it's even related to our being there?"  
  
"He's the nephew of the town's deputy, Tom. Who the hell would want him dead?"  
  
Tom played w/ the comforter on the bed. "I don't know. But I'd rather not think about it anymore than I have to- it will have to be discussed and persued enough as it is while we continue the investigation." He stood up and clapped his hands together. "How about we go for a little ride?"  
  
Page shuddered. "I'm NOT going into the woods."  
  
Tom grinned. "No, I've got a much better idea this time."  
  
After much protest and pleas, Page was dragged to the huge rolling knolls that were Cedar Hill Cemetery.   
  
"Now, just wait here," Tom said, stopping the patrol car in front of the funeral parlor.   
  
Page moaned. "The last time you said that someone was killed right outside of the car!"  
  
Tom laughed. "Yeah, well, here the people are already long dead in the ground."  
  
Page muttered curses in response to his vulgar idea of a joke. She watched him go to the side door of the funeral parlor where Mr. Carrison, caretaker, undertaker and owner lived. He was greeted by Strange and she didn't have to be listening to know he was making up "some B.S.'ed story about mischief in the cemetery to keep Strange from following them. The door closed after a few minutes and Tom returned to the car, chuckling. "Sucker!"  
  
Page rolled her eyes as they began to ascend the hill toward the farthest edge of the graveyard. "Why can't we ever go out to a nice restaurant or even the movies like a NORMAL couple?"  
  
"Aw, c'mon, Pagey, don't you like morbidity?"  
  
"Do I LOOK morbid to you?" Page replied.  
  
When the patrol car was out of sight to everything but tombstones and grass, Tom stopped and got out.   
  
"Tom, I want to go."  
  
"Aw, please, Page, we just got here!" Tom said pulling her out of the cruiser w/ him.  
  
Page continued to whine as Tom put his arm around her and strolled away from the patrol car w/ her. "We still have plenty of daylight left this time.. at least an hour."  
  
"Let's see a horror scene in an instant replay," Page said sarcastically.  
  
Tom roared. "God, I love it when you talk that way." He planted a big, wet kiss on her lips.   
  
Page reluctantly snuggled against his broad chest. "I just wish this whole David thing was over. The poor guy can't even be dead w/out causing trouble."  
  
Tom smoothed her hair. "He's not causing any trouble now and neither is his killer, whoever he is. Do you see anyone else dying?"  
  
Page closed her eyes. "No, and I don't want to."  
  
Tom tipped her chin up and looked down into her dark brown eyes. "Relax, Page. You haven't been yourself lately."  
  
Page glared at him. "Falling over the dead body of your friend does that to you."  
  
Tom stroked her cheek w/ one finger. "I know... but I want you to be happy. I want us to have FUN again. Like we used to."  
  
She touched his hand and closed her eyes again.  
  
Tom began to kiss her and she kissed him back, letting herself get lost in his touch, trying to drain David's limp corpse out of her thoughts. She allowed Tom to lower her to the ground between two headstones and despite her keen queasiness of cemeteries,permitted passion to be pursued.  
  
Raven O'Ryan knocked on the Carrison's door.   
  
Mr. Carrison opened it and smiled. He and Strange didn't get a lot of visitors aside from the families of mourn and seeing this pretty, happy girl warmed his heart. "Hello, how can I help you?"  
  
Raven hugged her literature book to her chest and smiled back at him. "Strange asked me for some help w/ the Hamlet homework we have in our English class."  
  
Mr. Carrison grinned. "Aw, you must be the infamous Raven. I'm sorry though, my dear but he's not in at the moment-he went up the hill."  
  
Raven frowned. "You mean, up the hill as in, the other side of the cemetery?"  
  
"Yes, Officer Sheridan was here investigating some possible gang activity and seems to have been taking a long time so he went to see if he was all right."  
  
Raven almost dropped her text book. "Oh no..."  
  
Mr. Carrison looked at her, confused. "Is something the matter?"  
  
Raven began to back away.   
  
"Do you want to come inside and wait for him, dear? It's getting pretty dark out there."  
  
Raven accelerated her pace and broke into a run. "He could kill him!"  
  
Page shivered and Tom covered her bare arm w/ his. "Cold?"  
  
She nodded. Tom sat up and helped her find her clothing in the darkness. He looked up at the sky which was just as dark as the silent cemetery around them. "It is getting pretty dark. We should go now."  
  
Page stood and wrapped her arms around herself. "Can you come over still?"  
  
"Sure," Tom agreed cheerfully. "We can watch Scary Movie and I Know What You Did Last Summer and all those."  
  
"Perfect," Page shivered.   
  
They walked towards the cruiser when the sound of a branch snapping stopped them dead in their tracks. "What was that?" Page demanded.  
  
Tom fumbled for the mini maglight on his belt. Switching it on, he let the small beam of light illuminate the tall overhanging evergreens and granite upright tombstones. "I can't see anything, I'm going to go get a bigger flashlight."  
  
"Tom, let's just leave."  
  
"No, it'll be ok, c'mon," he said pulling her towards the car.   
  
"No!" she asserted. "We are NOT going through this again! If someone is out here w/ us we need to get away from here."  
  
"How do you know it's someone? It could be an animal."  
  
"I don't care if it's a sloth, I wanna get out of here!"  
  
Tom chuckled and hugged her w/ one arm. "Fine, babe, we'll go watch slasher flicks in the comfort of our own home."  
  
They heard another noise. This time it sounded like conversation. Stopping a second time they both turned in the direction of the voices and strained their ears.  
  
"Yeah well now there's dirt on both of them, haha." The first voice said.  
  
"And there's going to be dirt on you too, asshole. Six feet of it!" the second voice snarled.  
  
"Huh?" the first voice asked, w/ discernible confusion.  
  
There was a muffled struggling noise and then silence.  
  
Tom pulled Page w/ him towards the car and hurried to get to his flashlight. He ran towards the direction of the noise w/ the light and cried, "Hey, who's there?" Not a moment later he let out a short groan and dropped to the ground. Page screamed.  
  
"TOOOOM!" She heard footsteps running back towards the direction the  
conversation had come from and she hurried towards Tom. He was still breathing but obviously unconscious. Curiosity began to override her fear and she picked up Tom's police flashlight and beamed it towards the sound of the fleeing footsteps. She saw another lifeless mound lying on top of one of the graves. Another beam of the flashlight caught a black-clad silhouette fleeing up and over the side of the hill in what appeared to be a full length cape. Momentarily forgetting the perpetrator she quickly went toward the second fallen figure. She shined the flashlight on it. His face was covered in blood, his shirt soaked in it. Page began to whimper as she used her own sweater to wipe the blood from his face to reveal the identity. Short, sandy blonde hair, blue eyes staring back at her.  
  
Page screamed. "BARRYYYYYY! NOOOOOOO!" She scrawled away from him quickly, struggling to catch her breath and then sprang to her feet and ran towards the patrol cruiser.   
  
Throwing the driver side door open she picked up the radio microphone she clicked the button on the side several times in a panic. "Hello? Hello?"  
  
"This is Officer Cantwell," a female voice replied, "I read you 411, what is your emergency?"  
  
"Hello?" Page choked out, "This is Page Bookman! I'm at the top of the Cedar Hill Cemetery-someone's here-he just killed my friend Barry and tried to kill Officer Sheridan. Please help-"  
  
The radio was cut off. Page clicked the button again. "Hello? Hello!" She sat back in the seat to inspect the microphone. She held up the useless mike w/ it's clipped cord. "Shit!" She heard the passenger door open and before she could blink it shut again. As she struggled to calm herself she heard the squeaking noise of something touching the front windshield.  
  
"No, please... just leave me alone!"   
  
The squeaking went on for what seemed eternity and then-silence.   
  
Page picked up the flashlight shakily and shined it on the windshield. There in dripping red letters were the words,  
  
"I WOULDN'T SAY THAT IF I WERE YOU!"  
  
  
Page screamed again and jumped to lock the door. She kicked the lock of the passenger door w/ her foot. "GO AWAY!"  
  
There was a rattling of keys and the rear door behind her was unlocked and opened. Page shined the flashlight in the backseat and screamed again. The person in the black cape! The face wasn't visible in the depths of the dark hood but she could easily make out the glint of a scythe blade.   
  
"What do you want?" Page cried.  
  
The person in the Death get up pointed a finger at her.   
  
Page made a muffled response that sounded something like, "Nuuh!" and fumbled w/ the lock on her door.   
  
"Death" hit the grating between them w/ its scythe and Page screamed as she fell through the door. Once outside, she pulled herself to her feet and began to run just as the Death lookalike began to come after her again.  
  
"Page!" a voice called running towards her.   
  
Page recognized her. "Raven! Turn around-he's coming after me!"  
  
Raven held up her own flashlight and saw the scythe and the scythe's owner in hot pursuit of Page. She grabbed Page by the arm and they both screamed as they ran down the hill towards the funeral parlor.   
  
Page through a glance behind them to see how close the chase was to discover in shock that no one was following them anymore. She pointed it out to Raven and they slowed to a jog as they neared the lights of the funeral parlor. Raven screamed as she stumbled right into Tom Sheridan. She backed away and threw the flashlight at his head. "HELP!" she screamed, "SOMEBODY HELP US!"  
  
Page grabbed at her and urged her to stop. "Raven! It wasn't Tom! He got knocked out while we were up there! It wasn't him!"  
  
"Officer Sheridan!" a voice called from behind them.  
  
Tom rubbed his head and groaned and looked in the direction of the voice w/ the girls.   
  
Strange was coming their way.   
  
"Murderer!" Page screamed, clinging to Tom's uniform shirt.   
  
Raven looked from Tom to Page to Strange. "Wait a minute-you think Strange did this?"  
  
"Barry is dead, Raven!" Page cried. "He's back up there on that hill. Kally said they got into a fight and Strange is the only person here besides us, what makes you think he wouldn't do it?"  
  
Raven looked at the ground and mumbled, "he went to go check on Officer Sheridan. That's what his dad said."  
  
"Yeah he checked on us all right-he almost got us killed!"  
  
"Hold it!" Tom said, "Now let's try to stay calm. We're not accusing any one of murder until we find good cause."  
  
Before anyone could argue further two patrol cars wailed into the parking lot of the funeral home, sirens flashing. Officer Cantwell and Deputy Rye questioned the four standerby's and were pointed in the direction of the murder scene. Barry's body was located and taken away and Strange, Tom, Raven and Page were taken to the police station for further questioning.  
  
Page was beside herself in shock and Raven was upset as well.  
  
  
"Poor Strange," Raven said when they were outside again and Tom was driving them home.   
  
"Poor Strange?" Page cried. "That guy has killer written all over him!"  
  
Raven shot her an angry look. "How do you know it was him, Page? There's no proof. Of course he was going to be there. He LIVES on the freaking cemetery grounds! And you're one to talk because you two shouldn't have been there in the first place."  
  
Page's mouth hung open, aghast. How could she be so blind? And so cruel? Two of Page's closest friends had just died and all Raven could do was defend that weirdo undertaker's son.  
  
Page sat back in her seat and sulked.   
  
  



	4. Part 4

At Kally's house the next day Page lay on the floor, talking to her.  
  
"I still can't believe he's gone..." Kally mourned.   
  
Page bit her lip sympathetically. "It's a sick, sad world we live in."  
  
"Not to mentioned scary fucked up and wrong!" Kally said, in tears. "I'm going to find that bastard who did it if it kills me."  
  
Page covered her eyes w/ her hands. "Please don't talk like that. 'Kill' is the last word I wanna hear right now."  
  
Kally stood up from her bed angrily. "How do you think I feel? My boyfriend just died!"  
  
Page was equally distraught. "You're not the only one who's upset, Kally, I lost a friend too and we all cared about Barry."  
  
Kally kneeled down next to Page and took her hands. "Then let's find out who it is,Page. The police aren't getting anywhere. Let's find the prick who did this to them and get him locked up!"  
  
Page frowned. "But how do we find him?"  
  
"Well, we can rule us out, we know it wasn't you or me because the guy chased you and I was at home baking cookies w/ Kelly."  
  
"Well, I think it's Strange because he was at the cemetery right after Raven and I came running down the hill."  
  
"And it wouldn't be Raven..." Kally said, crediting her friend that much.  
  
"No, it couldn't have been because the guy chased both of us."  
  
"So we think it's a guy. Who could it be?"  
  
"Well, Strange. And there's still Deputy Rye-we can't rule him out yet."  
  
"OK, well hold up. First we have to figure out who would have the motive to kill both of them," Page ascertained. "We thought David would've gotten into a scuffle w/ Deputy Rye but we know Strange got into a fight w/ Barry. Why would either of them want BOTH guys dead?"  
  
"Well, I don't know about David- I don't think Strange ever had anything to do w/ him. But maybe Deputy Rye WAS trying to cover up for you and Tom. I mean, it would certainly explain the two guys getting murdered right by Tom's car."  
  
Page gasped. "But what if they were in it together? What if Strange helped him?"  
  
Kally's eyes widened. "You think?"   
  
"I guess we'll have to find out somehow."  
  
"How about this," Kally said holding up a red flyer. It was an invitation to Mercedes LeBon's birthday party. Mercedes was the wealthiest girl in town and it would definitely be a large gathering.  
  
"Yeah!" Page agreed. "If we get everyone there the killer is bound to show up."  
  
"That means Strange would have to show in order for us to see if he was the one."  
  
"Well, we'll have to risk it. Besides, how can anyone kill someone in a house full of people? Just make sure he knows Raven's going to be there and he'll come w/ bells on his toes I'm sure. He's given her 'the look' plenty of times."  
  
  
  
Two weeks later, Mercedes LeBon's party seemed to be the first and foremost on every teenager in Cedar Hill's minds. The attractive, well-to-do redhead was not only the cream of every guy's ideal coffee but a sweet, sensitive friend to the majority of the girls as well. She was in fact, the best friend of Raven O'Ryan which meant Raven would definitely make an appearance. Opportunity seemed to be looking up for Kally and Page's investigation of Strange in that aspect.  
  
On the night of the party, Page met Kally and her twin sister Kelly at the Johnson house so they could prepare each other's makeup and dress together. Since Kelly and Kally were close through being natural "womb mates" Kelly had been filled in w/ the news of their investigation.   
  
"I think that's awful," Kelly said, brushing her long, light brown hair back into a ponytail. "But I don't like the idea of a killer being around town either. What if he kills us next?" She gave a dramatic, visible shudder.   
  
"Yeah, well, we're going to find him and it will all be over soon," Kally said, grabbing up her handbag determinedly.  
  
  
  
Mercedes answered the door and gave Kally, Kelly and Page each a delightful hug and accepted the colorfully wrapped gifts. "Thanks guys, you didn't have to."  
  
Kelly smiled smugly and Kally rolled her eyes at the comment.  
  
Mercedes looked past them as if expecting someone else to be w/ them. "Raven didn't come w/ you?"  
  
"Raven and I aren't exactly getting along since I branded Strange the candyman," Page said dryly.  
  
Mercedes eyebrows rose. "Oh? I didn't know Strange meant that much to her... I mean she was helping him w/ his homework and all but I thought she had a thing for Parker."  
  
Kelly shrugged. "You know how good ole Raven is-she likes everybody. Why wouldn't she get mad?"  
  
Kally stepped on her sister's foot. "Can it," she said stepping into the great foyer of the LeBon mansion.  
  
Kally observed the already crowded first floor, "C'mon, we've got work to do."  
  
"You wouldn't be talking about work on the murder case would you?"  
  
The girls spun around to find tall, lanky Rodney Philbert, all "dressed up" in yellow tweed and his thick brown framed glasses.   
  
Kelly wrinkled her nose in disgust. "Ugh, grotesque much! Don't you have other people to harass?"  
  
Rodney ignored her and took a step towards Page. "Bailey told me you guys were trying to find out who killed Barry and David."  
  
Page stared at him. "Bailey? How does Bailey know?"  
  
"I told him," Kelly replied, checking her lipstick out in her compact mirror. "I think he's cute... speaking of which, I think I'll go locate Mr. Garris right now. Ta-ta, girls!"   
  
Kally rolled her eyes and turned her attention to Rodney. "OK, so I guess you wanna help us out."  
  
Rodney nodded. "David and I go a long way back. Grade school days you know."  
  
Page nodded patiently.   
  
"OK, well, first off it seems like we have a psychopath on our hands. Dresses like Death, carries a scythe for a weapon. Sounds like Scream revisited, right?"  
  
"Right..." Kally said.  
  
"OK, well, remember in Scream how they were talking about all those RULES that horror stories have?"  
  
"Yeah," Page replied. "I've watched that movie a kzillion times, what's the point?"  
  
"The point? You don't know the point?! The point is, 'there are certain rules that one must abide by in order to survive a horror movie'."  
  
"Good quote, 'I see you've done your homework, too', " Page said wryly, throwing an I Know What You Did Last Summer line into the mix.   
  
Rodney nodded. "Well, the rules were simple-if you gave it up, you died."  
  
Page bit her lip guiltily. "Yeah ... and?"  
  
"And," Rodney continued, "if you said anything like 'I'll be right back', 'who's there?', 'what do you want?' or 'leave me alone', you were pretty much dead."  
  
Page slapped her hands against her sides, "well, I'm screwed then. And Tom too. He was always saying, 'I'll be right back' and when I said, 'leave me alone' and quite a few of the other forbidden lines the killer wrote stuff on the windshields."  
  
Rodney nodded triumphantly, "he's an educated horror fiend obviously. He was letting you know you broke the rules. You break the rules, you're in trouble. 'Biiiiig no no'. "  
  
"So now what?" Page asked. "We want to find the killer, not figure out how we broke the rules."  
  
Rodney began counting off his fingers. "Well, how are the suspects coming along? We've got..." he waited for her to fill him in.  
  
"Strange Carrison."  
  
"Strange Carrison! The freaky undertaker's boy! Who else?"  
  
"Deputy Rye knew about the prank Tom played on me in the cop car ... well, pretty much everyone knows about it now but he was the first to find out. Besides David but it couldn't be him because David's dead."  
  
"So we think it's Deputy Rye..." Rodney said, narrowing his eyes conclusively.  
  
"I think him and Strange are the only people we have to go on right now."  
  
"There's gotta be more though," Kally said, "what about Bailey?"  
  
Page was shocked. "Bailey? Why would he kill Barry and David? Those guys were   
best friends!"  
  
Rodney nodded. "Besides, if Bailey's a suspect, then I'm a suspect. And you two are suspects. Friends killing friends and all."  
  
Page nodded. "You've got a point. Let's move on."  
  
  
  



	5. Part 5

  
The night dragged on and still no more evidence. Rodney, Page and Kally kept an eye out for Strange who showed up only to look miserable that Raven was fawning all her attentions on Parker Lansky, the preacher's boy. He sat in a corner by himself, shredding pieces of paper that were in the pocket of his leather jacket.  
  
Page bit down on her lip for the umpteenth billionth time that night and said, "Well, I guess I'll go talk to him."   
  
Kally and Rodney watched her go off to talk to Strange but quickly disappeared outside when they saw none other than Deputy Rye's car pulling into the drive w/ Deputy Rye and Tom in it.  
  
"Hey Strange," Page said slowly sidling up to him. "You look upset."  
  
"Yeah, well, this party's pretty dull."  
  
Page took a seat on the settee beside him. "But it would be better if Raven were hanging out w/ you right?"  
  
Strange looked at her. "Why do you say that?"  
  
Page laughed. "Oh, c'mon, Strange, I've seen you around her. You want her."  
  
Strange tossed a little piece of his paper shreds to the floor. "Yeah, well, does that bother you? W/ me being a 'murderer' and all?"  
  
Page frowned. "I... I'm sorry I accused you. I was being attacked, Strange and it was easier to blame it on you than think logically I guess."  
  
Strange glared at her. "Thanks, I'll remember that." He stood up and walked away, leaving Page gaping hopelessly at his retreating leather covered back.  
  
Page looked around for Kally and Rodney but couldn't find them so she went to find Mercedes instead. "Hey, Mercedes, can I use your phone? I'm going to see if I can get a hold of Tom."  
  
Mercedes nodded, yelling over the music, "Sure! Use the one on the landing-take the two flights of stairs and it'll be on the third floor. It'll be nice and quiet up there!"  
  
Page climbed her way to the third floor and found the phone. She was dialing the number of the police station when she thought she heard something. Looking up she called out, "hello?"  
  
Eerie silence followed and she looked all around her.   
  
"Cedar Hill Police Department," the voice in the phone said.  
  
"Hi, can I speak to Officer Sheridan please?"  
  
While she was waiting she heard more footsteps and just as the woman on the   
other end was going to tell her Officer Sheridan wasn't there, Death was standing before her, cape, scythe and all.  
  
Page screamed and dropped the phone. She started to run for the stairs but tripped on the cord and sprawled across the floor.  
  
Death was instantly on top of her, pulling her up and dragging her away.  
  
She screamed again and begged Death to let her go but Death ignored her and no one else could hear her.   
  
Page was taken up another flight of stairs to the attic where Death wielded his scythe a few times for dramatic affect and then simply tied her to a chair.  
  
"What do you want?" Page sobbed.  
  
Death began to laugh, a masculine laugh that filled the whole room. "Page, Page,Page," he said. "You still don't know how to play by the rules ... you keep breaking them. Do you wanna die, Page? Your friends sure didn't."  
  
"You're such a loser!" Page spat w/ irritated disgust. Scream already has a three-part trilogy AND a parody, you're not going to become famous by making a fifth installment!"  
  
Death chuckled and Page wondered where she'd heard that laugh before. "Oh, won't I though? I've already managed to kill let's see..." he muttered inaudible names. "Three people all by myself w/ two people in waiting. Did good ole Stu Boy and Billy Boyfriend do that? Noooope! They had to HELP one another. I did these ones all on my own and, dum da da dum! The police are clueless. They'll never be able to figure it out." He put the scythe right underneath her chin. "Even you couldn't figure it out."  
  
Page tossed her hair behind her head haughtily. "Well, aren't you going to reveal yourself then? Steve and Billy did."  
  
"But Stu and Billy were a bit slow," Death laughed, twirling the long scythe. "They didn't plan things through the right way."  
  
Page smirked, feeling somehow that she had an advantage over this lunatic. "Well, Ben Willis in I Know What You Did Last Summer revealed who he was before he tried to kill Julie. And he killed everyone else all on his own. No one's here to save me, remember? Even the chick on Urban Legend let it be known who she was. It makes it more scary."  
  
Death laughed. "Well, if you insist!" He threw his hood back w/ a flourish and Page almost screamed again.   
  
"Bailey?" she cried, incredulously. "But.."  
  
"Surprise!" Bailey howled. "You like the Death costume? I thought that the chainsaw mask, the Ghostface, the fisherman look and the Eskimo parka were all well and good but I wanted at least SOME originality."  
  
Page shook her head, tears building up in her eyes. "Why, Bailey? Why would you kill them?"  
  
"Why?" Bailey asked, his face red w/ adrenaline. "WHY?! Asking for a motive is another death wish, Pagey baby-that's begging for climax. But ok, you're pressuring me for it and I wouldn't want to disappoint you..." He walked up to her chair and placed the blade of the scythe under her chin again. "But first, I have a couple of guests I'd like you to meet." He walked over to the sliding door of a closet. "And behind door number one!" he said flinging open the left side door. The slashed body of Deputy Rye fell out.  
  
Page cried.  
  
"Oooo, your number one suspect! Gonna cross him off the list now, Pagey?" Bailey cackled in delight and walked over to the other side of the closet to open the other door. "And behind door number two- Dorkus Excellencesus himself!"   
  
"Rodney..." Page said softly.  
  
"Yeppers!" Bailey said, spinning around to face her. "No Barry, no Rodney, no David and nooooo Deputy Rye. There's all the friends we had and therefore all the suspects. I almost had Tom as one but your damn buddy Raven had to interfere. I was going to kill off her and the Johnson girls too but they were too caught up in the crowd and I didn't want them to make a scene of course. Besides, you can't kill the virgins."   
  
A shudder coursed through Page's spine.   
  
"So, according to the rules, Pagey baby, you gotta go!" He made an elaborate slash through the air w/ his scythe.   
  
"But why did you do it, Bailey? They were your friends!" Page continued to sob.  
  
Bailey looked at the bodies. "Idiots, those two. I had nothing against Rye or Rodney but both were getting way too suspicious. So I had to get rid of them. Tom was next on the list but when he showed up at the party he got a call and had to leave Rye w/ Kally and Rod who were desperate to interrogate him. When Rye gave them evidence against his guilt-that he'd been arresting a drunk driver at the time of Barry's death, they knew they couldn't trace it back to Rye. So Kally went off to find Strange, the poor sob that your  
other accusations led to. I sliced and diced ole Deputy here and his little investigating friend."  
  
"But you killed Barry! And David!"  
  
"NO!" Bailey screamed in her face. His lips began to quiver w/ apparent sadness. "I only killed Barry... I never killed David."  
  
Page looked up at him in confusion. "You didn't?"  
  
"No... David, Barry and I saw you getting 'arrested' and followed you and Sheridan into the woods. We wanted to bust Tom for David's sake. We wanted him canned."  
  
"For David's sake what are you talking about?"  
  
"David was in love w/ you!"   
  
Page gasped. "He what?"  
  
"That's right, Page, David wanted you bad and so we had to prove to you that Tom was no good by getting him in trouble so you couldn't be w/ him anymore. We followed you guys out there and planned to confront Sheridan but things got all hot and steamy and David got upset. He took the scythe we had w/ us-the one we were going to tap on the windows to bust you guys w/, and he started cutting himself. We thought he was joking around at first but he started to bleed all over the place. He said he couldn't take it anymore-he was never going to be good enough! He slaughtered himself for you, Page!"  
  
Page trembled in her chair.  
  
"We were scared, Barry and me, we couldn't go to the cops because our  
fingerprints were on the scythe too-they'd put us away for killing our own friend. So we left the body and wrote stuff on the window to keep you from seeing the body. We both agreed to scare Sheridan off or get him fired after that. We had to avenge David's death. So when you two went on another sick romping through the cemetery, opportunity knocked. I wanted to kill him because it was all his fault, Page. David never woulda done it if Sheridan weren't in the big picture. So I told Barry about the idea and he got scared. He called me 'crazy' and said we should just go home. He didn't care about David-he was going to leave it all alone! I had to kill the traitor!"  
  
"Killing people isn't going to bring him back, Bailey. It hurt you, it hurt us all, but revenge won't do anything to help him."  
  
"You shut your filthy mouth!" Bailey screamed. "You don't know what you're talking about! David was like my little brother! I loved him... And he'd still be alive today if it weren't for you and your stupid boyfriend!" Bailey was crying himself now but attempted to pull himself together again. "So now, you two gotta die. You broke the rules, you broke ALL the rules and you're my motive for it all anyway so you're the grand finale. You gotta go now, Pagey, gotta go."  
  
He walked to the closet and pulled a third person out of the middle.   
  
"Tom!" Page cried out.  
  
"Yeah, I told you, he has to die too! And since you had the audacity to continue your little romance w/ him I think I'll let you watch him die."   
  
Tom's protests were muffled by the gag in his mouth.   
  
Page watched as Bailey raised the scythe above Tom's head and prepared to bring it down.  
  
"Not so fast!"  
  
All eyes turned to the doorway. It was Kally and she had Deputy Rye's 9mi.   
  
"Oh great!" Bailey groaned. "Just fucking great! Why can't there ever be one decent horror movie that ends in bloodshed instead of heroism?" He started towards Kally, wielding the scythe.  
  
" 'Cause you picked the wrong heroes to fuck w/!" Kally yelled, pulling the trigger. She shot backwards w/ the force of the gun going off and from shock and Bailey went the other way w/ a bullet to the stomach.  
  
Kally helped Tom and Page w/ their bonds. Before they knew it, the attic was swarming w/ the on-looking partygoers, news reporters and cops.  
  
"And the ex-virgin still lives," Page ascertained wearily.  
  
  
  



	6. Part 6

** One month later, Page was eating lunch w/ her remaining circle of friends. She'd more or less reconciled her differences w/ Strange and Raven. Kally was still disturbed about Barry but she was only female and that was to be expected.  
  
"So, Page," Raven said, "How's things w/ Tom?"  
  
"Oh, not so good."  
  
Raven frowned. "I'm sorry."  
  
Page took a bite out of her apple. "Yeah, well, I never really liked the whole cemetery thing or the woods for that matter. I'm looking for a more romantic guy these days."  
  
Strange looked at her and then looked shyly towards Raven. "What does Tom think about that?"  
  
Page shrugged. "I hear he's dating some meteorologist or something."  
  
"Hey, Page," Kally smiled, jumping back into her horror movie frenzy, " 'if they make a movie about you, who's going to play you?' "  
  
" 'Oh, I shudder to think,' " Page grinned back.  
  
Strange, catching up w/ their intrigue, joined in w/, "I see you as a young Neve Campbell myself."  
  
"Thanks, Strange," Page replied, "but w/ my luck they'd cast Ashley Olsen."  
  
**

~The End~  
  
Stay Tuned for the upcoming novels of Raven, & Crow!  
  



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